I'm so glad you've stopped by my blog! I am a Women's Minister and a former Pastor's Wife. I love finding God in my regular-everyday-stuff. I struggle with keeping up with the laundry, I love blogging, and my kids are my first line of ministry. I am recently widowed. So God and I are on a brand new journey as I try to find peace and understanding. Please grab a cup of coffee and let's get to know one another as we journey on our faith walk together.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Wisdom in what you DON'T say!

I've tried for I don't know how long to be quiet and reserved.  At 40 years old, I've finally resolved to the fact that, "That's just not me!"  I know without a shadow of a doubt that God made me to be the outgoing person that I am.  Very rarely will you find me being shy.

However... having said that - one of my pet peeves is when people say, "This is me; and I've gotta be me - so like it or lump it!"

Why?  Because "this" (who I am) belongs 100% to God.  I must always keep in check how I'm acting - is "this is me" part is in tune with who God is molding me to be?  Perhaps God wants to change a few things about me.

I've known for quite some time that there was a part of the "this is me" that needed to be changed.  As I said, I'm a very outgoing - vocal person.  Most of the time this is for everyone's good.  However, there is another side to this same coin that is not always so pretty.

Today I'm going to step out a little of my comfort zone and share with you a vulnerable part of me - while maintaining a bit of privacy at the same time... so please bare with me.

There are times... within the comforts of my own house that what I say, what comes out of my mouth isn't quite as pleasant as it should be.  No, I'm not talking about cuss words or anything of the sort.  Just here lately (and I'm sure it's in part due to grief of missing my Rockstar) that my tone and volume could certainly be less harsh.

I began to pray about it and God has shown me some amazing verses that I've been keeping at the front of my mind and even recite in my head before I discipline my children.  I only share this with you because I just can't believe that I'm the only one who struggles with this.

I'm proud to say that since God has shown me these verses, I have gone 3 full days with a much calmer demeanor!  Yes, I have still disciplined and corrected my children.  Yes, I have still gotten upset when I've broken things or cannot find missing treasures.  However, it's the spirit of my words that has changed!

Are you dying to know the verses?  I promise you if you apply them to your life they will help in your tone, volume and perhaps if you even speak at all!!!

The Lord showed me these two verses in parts - and together they have made a difference in my daily life!

1 Kings 22:14 (ESV)
But Micaiah said, "As the Lord lives, 
what the Lord says to me, that I will speak."

Whew!  I had to read this one several times!  What was happening here was a King wanted the wisdom of his prophet.  But according to the king, Micaiah, the prophet, only foretold of bad news.  So on this particular occasion the king asked Micaiah if he was going to give him bad news again.  Verse 14 was his answer.

However, this verse can still apply to me.  Unless it's something the Lord would say - perhaps I don't need to say it either!  Or how about... say "it" how the Lord would say it??  This verse has rocked my world lately.

How do I make it work?  Right before I want to yell or scream, I softly say to myself, "As the Lord lives..."  and then I proceed.  Amazing the difference it makes with what comes out of my mouth!

Now for Part II - Which I have titled in my brain - "A Cool Spirit"

Proverbs 17:27-28 (ESV)
Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, 
and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding.

Wow!  I want to be a woman of knowledge and understanding.  It's not always what I say, or how I say it - perhaps it's what I DON'T say that speaks volumes!  Interesting concept!

Restraint and cool spirit.  My two new words of the day.

I have often heard it said if you want to know what kind of mother you are - watch your kids play house.    I've heard my children repeat my words and my tone and even my body motions.  It hasn't always been a pleasant thing to watch.

I also know that children learn about their Heavenly Father by watching their earthly Daddy.  Eventually the memory of my kids' Daddy will begin to fade and they will need to depend on how I am parenting them to have a picture of how God parents!  I don't want them to think that their Heavenly Father yells more than comforts - gets angry before applying wisdom.  I want them to know His understanding ways because they've seen it come from me as well.

Like I said, today was really more of a time of vulnerable confession - I hope it helps other mothers out there who likewise struggle with their mouth!

I love you all dearly!

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