Loose Clothes

Yesterday I did something that my Mom always used to do - once a year - with me & my sister... we went school clothes shopping in Houston!

For the first time every in Jordan's school history - no uniforms are required!  So instead of robotically purchasing 5 different colored polo shirts and 5 khaki shorts - I took the kids to The Woodlands to shop for fun school clothes!

We had a blast!  Of course the kids learned what the word "appropriate" means - crazy shorts, glitter shirts will not last past the first wear, and rain boots are not "school shoes".

At the end of our shopping - I asked the kids if I could have a turn.  So my Mom very graciously watched the kids for me while I went to try on "just a few" things.

Now here's where the story takes a bit of a sad turn...

For the past 2 weeks I've been working out like a crazy woman.  Not only am I on a serious marathon training schedule - but I've also added INSANITY (by Shawn T) workouts to my days.  I'm kind of putting myself through my own version of "two-a-days".

charts of my different workouts - with stats

Before going shopping I checked my stats - I've lost 9 pounds and 1 inch in my waist and legs!  Yay!  Right?

I wonder - how many pounds lost would equal a new size - or loose clothes?  I hate women's sizing!

Let's just say I was not the size I was hoping I would be after such loss.

But you know what - these are just physical clothes.  I know one day I will reach my fitness and weight goals - in time.  However, there is another fitness and size goal that I have set my mind to and it has nothing to do with something I would find in Macy's!!

The Bible speaks of another kind of loose clothing!

Check this out....

Psalm 30:11 (ESV)

You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; 

You have loosed my sackcloth 

and clothed me with gladness, 

that my glory may sing 

Your praise and not be silent.

Did you catch that?!  I'll exchange loose clothes for gladness!  How exciting!!!

I have many fitness goals - but did you hear the greater ones found here?

1.  For mourning to turn into dancing
2.  Loose clothing exchanged for clothes of gladness
3.  To not be silent about my Lord

One day my size 12 clothes are going to be too big... one day.  And believe me, you'll hear about it!

However, the desire of my heart would be that you would hear about how great my God is more than something I find in a store.  That others around me would know that no matter what tragedy I experience, my God is big enough to loosen my sad clothes & replace them with glad ones... and that I would one day dance again!

Are you tracking your progress for these kinds of loose clothing?  Where do you stand?

I must admit - I'm still on the journey - but working towards it every day!

Even If...

I posted this on my church website today...

Even If...

This morning I was reading about Josiah in the Old Testament.  Josiah was an amazing king.  He became king at the age of 8 years old and by age 16 he was cleaning house!  Meaning, he truly began to seek the Lord with all his heart.  He put into action what he felt in his heart.

Most of you know the story of Josiah.  He was the young king who commissioned the leaders to clean out the temple.  In this cleaning they found "a book".  Yes, it was the Book of the Law!  King Josiah listened to the words read to him from this "book" and was devastated at how far the people had drifted from the Lord.  He tore his clothes in response to what he heard.

He inquired the wise counsel of a prophetess, Huldah.  She did confirm that the devastation that was prophesied in the Bible would indeed come.  However, she gave this word of hope to Josiah...

2 Chronicles 34: 26-28 (ESV)

"But to the king of Judah, who sent you to inquire of the Lord....

Regarding the words that you have heard, because your heart was tender

and you humbled yourself before God when you heard His words against this place and its inhabitants,

and you have humbled yourself before Me and have torn your clothes and wept before Me,

I also have heard you, declares the Lord.  Behold I will gather you to you fathers,

and you shall be gathered to your grave in peace

and your eyes shall not see all the disaster that I will bring upon this place and its inhabitants."

Lesson #1: We too need to seek the Lord with all our heart and humble ourselves before God.  In fact I see a little list forming here:

1.  Seek the wise counsel of the Lord

2.  Be humbled at His word

3.  Hear His Word

4.  Weep before the Lord

5.  Demonstrate how we have messed up

6.  Make your heart tender toward the Lord

And look at what God did for Josiah in response:  Peace.  His eyes would not see all the disaster that was planned!  What an amazing promise.  

Wouldn't you like to hear something like that from God?  "Humble yourself before me, and you will see no disaster!"  

Where can I get in line to "humble myself"?  I'm totally up for seeing no disaster!!!

Lesson #2:  We can totally copy Josiah's obedience to God's Word - but we need to allow God to do an individual work in our lives.  This was God's promise for Josiah.  Even if God has a different plan for you - TRUST HIM!!!

I know we have all seen more disaster in our lives than we thought we would see.  And I would imagine there's even more to come.  However, I believe that we are still to follow the list above - seek Him, be humbled before Him, hear His word and TRUST.

I heard a song this week that illustrates no matter what - we can still praise Him.  I know that many of you are praying for a miracle to come in your life.  You've been praying for this relief from disaster for quite some time.  It could be for physical healing, emotional healing, financial relief...  What if no relief comes?  What then?  What if in the midst of following the list above - we still see disaster?  What happens to our faith?

It would be really easy to get mad and be jealous of Josiah.  However, we must belief the truth - that God is for us!

Psalm 56:9 (ESV)

This I know, that God is for me.

Listen to this song and let it minister to you today as is has done for me.

My Multitude

One week.  There's only 1 more full week of July remaining.  I don't know about you, but when August starts - my mind is directed towards school stuff.

Next week I'm going to start working in my classroom.  I've already been salivating at the new fun school supplies.  This morning I looked up the dates for our Tax Free Weekend to plan some "school clothes" shopping!

As I sat down to pray and read my Bible this morning, I asked the Lord to direct my focus on Him.  The list of things I wanted to pray about were - in my mind... GINORMOUS!

Don't you ever long for simple peace on all sides?  No drama.  God gave this to some of the kings in the Old Testament.  This verse is King Asa of Judah speaking...

2 Chronicles 14:7 (b) (ESV)

We have sought Him and He has given us peace on every side.

"Peace on every side" - can you even imagine a life like that?  I would be thrilled with just a DAY like that!

So in my Bible reading - I just stopped and asked the Lord for "peace on every side".

But... then I read further...  I quickly learned that King Asa still had to fight.  And he didn't just fight small armies - check out his prayer when he was faced with an army of a million enemy soldiers!

2 Chronicles 14:11 (ESV)

And Asa cried to the Lord his God, 

"O Lord, there is none like You to help, 

between the mighty and the weak.  Help us, 

O Lord our God, for we rely on You, 

and in Your name we have come against this multitude.  

O Lord, You are our God, 

let not man prevail against You."

Want to know the outcome?  God allowed King Asa and his army to leave not one of those million enemy soldiers alive!  They were allowed to plunder a ton of stuff from the enemy too!  They won!

But they still had to fight.

Now, I'm so thankful I'm not facing a million soldiers with weapons.  But... in my prayer journal, I made a list of my own "multitude."  The things that are staring back at me - the things that I'm facing.

Here's just an excerpt:  raising Jordan & JP without their Dad, new job, finances, marathon training, JP's salvation, will God bring another "someone" in my life again, many other questions about my future....

This list can be overwhelming!  I'm sure we all have our own "multitude" that we face every day.

I took King Asa's prayer and made it my own this morning.  I may not have all the answers for my multitude - but in His name I can come against them all and you can too!

Newnesses

Do you ever long for just a regular day?  A regular-no-drama season for your life?  The kind of time in your life where you know what you're doing, you know all the answers and life is predictable and manageable?

This sounds kind of dreamy to me!  However, it seems at every turn, I still have new adventures ever before me.

As many of you have heard... I have a new room in my house.  I realized the more Jordan was growing that she didn't need to share a room with her younger brother any longer.  Therefore, I gave her my room.  We fixed it all up - nice and girly.  I updated JP's room a bit with some Spiderman accessories.

Then, with the help of my family and some very strong guys from my church we moved all my stuff to the upstairs (converted attic) huge room!  I love it!!

My new bed!
(really my old bed that I just now got back!)

My new vanity area!  Cool huh?!

In just a few short weeks, I'll be embarking on another new thing... Chemistry Teacher at a new school district.  I'm super excited and nervous all at the same time.

During my prayer time this morning I wrote in my journal about all the "newnesses" that I'm experiencing.  I read a verse that confirmed just how close I need to be to the Lord to make it through all these new adventures.

Psalm 9:9-10 (ESV)

The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, 

a stronghold in times of trouble.  

And those who know Your name 

put their trust in You,

for You, O Lord, have not forsaken 

those who seek You.

I love the end where David reaffirms that the Lord will not forsake those who seek the Lord.

I realized that I have a lot of seeking the Lord to do in all my newnesses.  I know this is probably not real word - "newnesses" - but it doesn't mean I don't still have these in my life.

I bet you have some too.  So how do we deal with them all?  David encourages us to know the Name of the Lord, put our trust in Him, and seek Him.  As a result - He will not forsake us!

I made a list of as many of my newnesses that are currently in my life - and committed to seek the Lord in them all.  What will you do with your newnesses?

I love you all dearly!

Hope for the Charred Remains

I have so many things to say on my blog today!

For starters, I really have missed writing on my blog.  New adventures and crazy new schedules got the best of me.  I like for everything to have it's proper place - especially my schedule.  And for the past 18 months I've been in some sort of survival mode where tyranny of the urgent took over my life.

I would like to tell you that I'm getting that under control and all will be as it should be soon - but to be perfectly honest - I'm enjoying a restful, undisciplined summer.  In about 3-4 short weeks I'm going to need to turn my mind and my heart to discipline but for now I'm soaking up all that this summer has to offer!

Having said that... let's move on to this past weekend.  It was John's birthday and we seem to have created a beautiful tradition of spending the weekend with the Barnabas Contagion and their families in Bastrop.  These people are truly amazing!  I could go on and on about these folks I call family -  but I don't think there are enough words!

On Saturday afternoon around 5pm - the hottest part of the day - I decided I wanted to take the mile hike to see the deer stand where John breathed his last.  Too many times I close my eyes and wonder what the scene looked like on that day.  I'm not a hunter, but I've seen many different types of stands, and I wanted to clear up as many of the unknowns in my head as I could.

As it turned out - all of the men that were there - came with me.  As we hiked we recalled many fun memories of John.  Some remembered great things he used to say, some shared really cooky things he used to do - it was really a nice walk.

It was filled with many emotions, because as most remember, last summer much of Bastrop burned in a fire.  My friends' 200-acre property was completely burned!  Their house, John's tree and a few other precious spots were miraculously saved.

So on our walk we saw many many charred trees, holes in the ground were huge trees once towered the property, and washed away roads.  However, we also saw more sunflowers than I've ever seen in one place!  The green over-growth was up to our knees!  Green leaves were found on several trees!

While the layout of the property looked completely different - it was still very beautiful.  Even though there was devastation all around, it was still very peaceful.  And as I walked, anxiously awaiting when we would arrive at John's final spot on Earth, I took in the beauty of it all.

I thought about how our lives are much like "The Bastrop" (as Jordan used to call this place).  Jordan asked me as we arrived on Friday if this place would ever grow back.  As we hiked you couldn't help but see the new growth that God was allowing to happen.

Green amongst the charred remains.

Isn't this just like our own lives?  Devastating events happen to us all.  And perhaps leave us a bit charred in places.  But with His love, strength, and light - new growth will appear.  Yes, it may look different and strange.  Yes, scars and evidence of a tragedy may remain - but if we embrace His plan and accept His changes for our lives - we too can experience peace and beauty again.

We can have beautiful green spots sprouting all around our charred edges!  We too can "grow back"!

I thought I might just share a few pictures from my weekend at The Bastrop.

Flowers on the hike

 

Beautiful berries were found everywhere!!

Deep holes left by completely burned trees.
The small holes were where the roots once were.

The hike to the deer stand.  Notice all the green!!

Here it is.  You can't see the stand.
But this is the tree where John said goodbye to this Earth.

The scene leaving The Bastrop.

This was the last thing John got to do with the kids.
I'm so thankful this tire swing - hanging from a tree - survived!
What fun memories for the kids!
This is their favorite spot on the property!

Coming in for a landing...

This week has been filled with an awesome week of Vacation Bible School!  As of yesterday we had 17 professions of faith!  God is so wonderful!

I had the humbling experience of leading a little 4th grader to the Lord on Tuesday!  What a way to start the week!

Today we wrap things up and although I'm ready to get some rest... I'm going to be sad to let these precious little lives go...

Please continue to pray for these 17 young kids as they continue to grow in Christ this summer.

Next week is a whole new summer adventure... Jordan & I are going to GA Camp @ Pineywoods Baptist Encampment.  We're both super excited!!!

(Oh!  But before we go.... Jordan has her very first Dance Recital on Saturday! - be looking for pictures of that soon!)

I thought it was only fitting to put up our VBS theme song as my Friday Song.  (if it's going to be in my head all week - I might as well pass on the joy to you guys!  LOL)

10 years...

It's Friday.  The normal time of the week when I post a song.

This Friday is very different.  Today I should have been soaking up some beautiful rays on an amazing beach holding hands with the love of my life.  That was the plan anyway.  John and I so very much wanted to take a second honeymoon to some tropical location to celebrate our 10 Year Wedding Anniversary.

Apparently God had different plans.  I still cannot believe we're not holding hands today.  Many days I look down at my empty hands and wonder... "What do I do with them as I'm walking into a store.... as I walk into church.."

Here's what I do know though.... I know God is holding me.  I know He never gives up on me - even though many times in the last 17 months I've wanted to do just that.

Today - to celebrate a beautiful relationship - even though we must live in different locations - I thought it was only fitting to share one of my favorites of John's songs.

The Way.  Some of my favorite lines...

I love the way You take me by the hand - lead me on.
Love the way You hold me to Your heart to love me Lord.
I love the way You lead me to Your teachings for my life,
I love the way You don't give up, though I give up on the fight.
The way You love me through it all, the way You died to save my soul,
I stand in awe of You.

(if you listen all the way through - you'll hear him talk)

Enjoy your Friday!